Writing Online Dating Emails

When it comes down to it nobody in the world likes to write online dating emails. Most of us graduated high school or college years ago. Our days of feeling like we have a homework assignment to write should be over.

And let’s face it, writing online dating emails sure does feel like it is homework most of the time. For those of us that are still actually in college, writing these emails is probably even more annoying, distracting us from the work that we should be completed and the homework assignments we should be writing.

When it comes down to it, there are enough chores and busy events going on in most of our lives. We all have better things to do than to sit in front of the computer for hours on end trying to create a response.

Yet, for most of us, when we don’t sit for hours on end trying to find the perfect words for our emails we often find that our success rate with receiving a response can be very low. This is not good either.

So where is the balance?

The truth is that writing emails should never take you more than 2 to 5 minutes per email. If you are taking anything longer than that you are one of two things:

a) You are probably over-thinking things. Over-thinking what you write in your emails will not only cause you to spend way too much time in front of the computer screen, but you will also accidentally write emails that seem fake and disingenuous. Women can sense a mile away when a man is trying to hard. This comes off as clingy, needy, and desperate, and will result in instant rejection.

b) You are most likely unfamiliar with how to be successful at online dating. Online dating is a unique medium that requires a separate set of skills, ideas, and techniques to be successful.

So how do we learn the skills that we need to succeed? The main idea behind being successful is to first learn the laws of creating attraction. Creating attraction in females requires a specific set of things to be done. Once you learn what these rules are, you can adapt them specifically to online dating by incorporating the laws of attraction into the emails you write, the profiles you put up, and the pictures you create.

It is all about creating attraction, which starts with the online dating email!

Tags:

Free Dating – Who to Trust in the Online Dating World?

Internet dating is incredibly popular and there are plenty of information online about how to use these sites. But one of the key questions that is rarely answered is, ‘How do I know the person I am dealing with on a dating site is for real?’ There are plenty of scammers, liars and cheats using internet dating and in this article I’m going to give you some common sense advice about how to identify them. While I can’t guarantee that you’ll be 100% successful in identifying these fraudsters, you will at least be better equipped to spot some of their tactics.

The first thing you need to think about is how much deception you’re prepared to put up with. Many people listed on online dating sites lie about their age, their height, location, marital status and so on. In my opinion, a ‘zero tolerance’ policy is best – if it turns out someone has lied to you about their age, then what else have they deceived you about?

It’s far better that you only want to connect with people who are being totally honest with you. It is very hard to trust someone who is has lied about some facet of themselves, for whatever reason.

Whatever your policy to people being dishonest, the first way to spot such people on a dating site is to look closely at their profile information, and their photo (if they’ve chosen to display one). Look for inconsistencies. For instance, if they say they are 35 years of age, yet the photo is of a much younger person, then either the photo is very out of date, or it is a picture of someone else.

Look at their profile information, and what they say about themselves. If they say they are a university graduate in a senior management role, yet their spelling and grammar are appalling… you are likely to be dealing with an untrustworthy person.

Similarly, if they say they are have a well-paid job in advertising, but have moved to an impoverished African country… this is unlikely to be true. Yes, it can happen, but it is very rare that someone would make this kind of lifestyle choice unless they are a charity worker or missionary.

If someone sends you a message via a dating site, check the text of their message carefully. Is the message very generic? That is, could it be written to just about anyone? If this is the case, it’s likely the sender just ‘cuts and pastes’ messages to whoever he wants. He’s unlikely to be genuinely interested in you. On the other hand, a more genuine person will write in a way that you know they are writing to you, specifically. They may mention something from your profile, or comment on your photo.

Another more obvious problem are scammers who ask you directly for money. They may send you a message on the dating site, saying they need you to clear some international money. This is a well-known scam, but plenty of people still fall for it.

The bottom line with all of this is that you need to be alert and curious about people who are listed on dating sites. Most will be genuine, honest and good people. However, others will be deceptive and dangerous. Looking objectively for inconsistencies in their profile, photo and messages they send you is the best way to spot the troublemakers.

Tags:

Simple Conversation Works

Ever have those moments in your relationship when you feel you simply don’t have much to express to one another? Maybe you can attempt to make simple conversation with one another like; hey there what would you like to do today? You look really great today. I love your outfit you should wear more like it. The food really was delicious, thank you for cooking for me. Wow, you did a fantastic job cleaning. Would you like to venture out somewhere quaint today? Can I get you something, you’re sort of quiet, is everything OK? That was funny, what made you say that? Hey remember when we…? The list can go on; the point is many people don’t realize small talk usually turns into a full long-lasting conversation.

Tell me, who if complimented wouldn’t continue to converse? At times one may make conversation into a big deal, nonetheless its simple small talk that may become something a lot more meaningful. We very often take a look at someone and may not know what to express, however, if we were to say something small but thoughtful showing our partner we considered them in a special way or appreciated some small gesture they have done for you personally has much more meaning then attempting to create a big conversation.

Let’s say you had been upset with your mate and unfortunately days have passed without speaking. You wake up and think, I’ve had enough of this and you want to say something however, you have no idea of things to say. If you turn to your mate in the morning and say just a few words like “Good Morning;” do you realize that could result in an opening for dialogue? It may mean let’s talk, I’m sorry, or it may open the door to communication again. Those simple words allows your mate know you would like the situation to be over and also you wish to start talking with one another.

Inside, your mates’ thoughts might have been; did they think of me today? I love my mate, but, I feel so distant. Why can’t talk be like it used to be? If perhaps we’re able to simply sit and talk, things would change. I remember when we couldn’t stop speaking with one another. I wonder if they still feel the same way I feel. I feel emptiness between the two of us. Imagine a one liner that could make your mate feel secure again and begin that special dialogue like back in the day that you two privately shared.

Simple conversation can be quite valuable. If in your case your mate has had a very hard day and you don’t know what to express, what if you simply turn and say “Is there anything I can do for you.” You are not saying you are able to fix it however, you are lovingly acknowledging that you know something is wrong and you are there for that person. Small talk leaves much available to learn about another person. Small talk creates plenty of larger conversations. It takes only a couple of words to engage someone into conversation.

Here is another example, say you see someone reading and leaned over and said, “What’s that you’re reading?” You have just shown personal curiosity about them, you would think that would certainly spark a conversation in regards to what they are reading and perhaps why they like reading such books. Personal interest is always an optimistic method to spark talk. Here you’re talking not with regards to you, but, you are showing interest in the one you care about.

Why not try a way today to spark conversation with a couple of personal interest words to the one you care for? Try simple conversation and you’ll be amazed with the way it can engage you in meaningful conversation.

Tags: